THE OVER THINKERS DILEMMA

HOW TO STOP OVERTHINKING AND JUST CHILL

The problem with overthinking is that one simple action where the definite outcome cannot be predicted will ruin an entire week. One text message sent , where the tone doesn’t read quite right is perfect overthinking material. There just needs to be cause for one question and the familiar loss of focus on other matters  takes complete control. The what ifs just appear as if by magic and soon the brain cells are off on an aimless rampage to migraine Town . An entire week down the drain.

The other problem is that half the scenarios conjured by the imagination usually are too far fetched to occur,  we know this but what does logic have to do with it? It would all be for the best if the conclusions we drew were positive, but who are we kidding, the worst part of the situation is that we focus on the negative outcomes of past events, and predictions for the future , we blow it out of proportion to the extent where it’s impossible  for us to ever catch a break. Literally we are always dying ,or losing a job ,or going to jail, or getting cancer ,or some other terrible end result!

Overthinkers are cautious people, we are great to have on a team to limit the number of mishaps, to see all the curve balls before they happen , but usually we are stressed out and just want a break from thinking so much. We crave peace and a couple hours to just enjoy the simplicity of our existence if we can actually see it!

Most over thinkers are empaths ,we care and we feel deeply and we are quite sensitive to our environment, every nuance, every intricate relation that takes place, every word said with an ulterior motive ,we see it ,We break it apart, we examine it and we play our  logic against our intuition in a daily exhausting game.

WHAT CAUSES OVERTHINKING

While overthinking is not labeled  a mental disorder, it is usually  thought of being the  by product of certain conditions, like anxiety and depression. Some people just have a bad habit of worrying too much. For the most part I’m not for lables because when it comes to the power of the mind and self healing ,labels can paint mental pictures that can be distructive to the healing of the self , and create blockages that hinder access to our true spiritual selves.
This may not be popular opinion but  the inability to make a decision and the lack of trusting ones self  can lead to overthinking. On a deeper level ,if we can understand that not every thought that pops into our head needs to be acknowledged and that our sense of self does not rely or  depend on every waking thought we can live much more mentally peaceful lives.  

Eckhart Tole in his book “THE POWER OF NOW” has a whole chapter on the role of the mind In the overthinking process. He goes indepth into the reversed roles between our minds and who we are, and  how over thinking becomes an addiction which only feeds on the past and future thereby robbing us of the liberation and joys of the present.

If we take a step back we can examine our own thoughts and the way we begin to spiral. Either we dredge up some old memory from last month or some situation gone by and we build on it to create many different future scenarios , and if we do think of the present or focus on it, it is always in relation to the  story we are creating.  Our present therefore is always a means to an end.

We are not our thoughts ,we don’t have to be afraid of them, entertain them ,or identify with them . We also are not  slaves  to our mind we are not supposed to be stressed by a tool that is there for our use. Our job is to learn to use our mind and  thoughts instead of the other way round.

WAYS WE CAN LIMIT OVER THINKING

While we cannot stop ourselves from thinking, (that is not what we want, because the ability to think is what makes us different from animals and plants )and  we also shouldn’t stop ourselves from planning for the future, we can however create order in the way we think without overwhelming ourselves.  Habits are not always easily broken but they can be with time and practice.

1. When you encounter a problem try to focus on the next logical step. Life is much simpler this way. Understand that life is not black and white ,there are many shades,and many options with multiple different outcomes. Simply do the next logical thing.

2. Practice bringing yourself to the present moment. Try to concentrate on what you are doing at the time whether it’s taking a shower or washing up the dishes. This creates a break in thought and over time you can decrease the amount of time you spend indulging in negative thought spirals , this is actually what meditation is.

3. Learn to Rewire your brain. Instead of sliding down a slope of negative thoughts begin to change the dialogue in your head. You can do this through affirmations.  For example you can begin by saying. “Things are always working out for me” or “I am always getting better and better “

4. Spend more time in Nature and by this I mean LOTS of time in nature

5. Do more physical activities.

6. Do breathing exercises . know that nothing is a bad as it seems. I have learnt that there is nothing you cannot breathe through.

7. For empaths we are very sensitive to our environment, and I have learnt that our gut instinct and intuition when trusted can yield great results. Learn to trust your self ,it saves time and a ton of stress.

8. If you feel too overwelmed never be afraid to ask for help. The bible recommends asking , I recommend it, you are not alone. In this world there is always someone who can and will help you. Talk to a friend or a professional . For me I enjoy meeting complete strangers and having a great chat, We both unburden ,never meet again and that Is totally fine by me. Don’t sit with your problems and feel trapped because you are not.

9. Make a decision and take action most problems arise from procrastion and lack of decision making and following through.

As you go through life you will realise that there is nothing you can’t handle, you have strength and power beyond what you could possibly imagine and nothing is ever that serious . Honestly it isn’t, life is ebb and flow We are destined for both and we cannot control everything so might as well relax through them all.
As an empath I suffered from over thinking to the point where I had constant headaches that lasted for days. I tried to decipher everything and thought deeply about even mundane things. My mind invented scenarios for situations that hadn’t even occurred yet. I had to make a concious decision to help myself. One book that helped me was  “The power of now” among others. I hope this post was of value to you.
I am always grateful for your time and hope to see you next post.